Ohmyhashbrowns! I haven't blogged in what seem like a super dinosaur ancient long time! I had and have so much to say yet words fail me. Fail to reason why i have not blogged for a long long time. So there are stories. Stories after stories after stories. Struggles after struggles. I don't know. But in the midst of everything, my God was still there. Still have been and always will be. Over the past few months, after finding out that i'm not gonna be SO active in church for a while, it's been hell. That didn't shatter my knowledge of who i serve. But it really disturbed my walk a lot. It went up and down. It was hard to pray. Hard to sing. Exams were so near. I couldn't focus. Everything was a mess that i couldn't get it all together. I tried to cry out but the hurt was so cut so deep that i couldn't say a word.

Rushes of insecurity filled my heart. I didn't know what i was anymore. I felt stupid at some point. Where i felt i wasn't as smart as the others. (cheap trick played huh?) I just asked God again and again. Why why why why why...why. I thought i had it all together. Then i felt Him saying, "Michelle, you have had Me in your mind..but was I in your heart?" I think there are lots of times we tend to do our devotions half-heartedly at times or nothing even. I think i tried to avoid that fact. It shows how important it is to really be true to God. Cause we can't hide anything from Him and He DEFINITELY knows our thoughts and hearts.

And constantly need to be reminded that through the many blessings and gifts that are given to us, we still have our backfires. Trials, temptations, MORE TRIALS. Yet we have an everlasting Solution, King, Saviour, Provider to overcome it with us. Just the name Jesus itself, is so power. So powerful to break and pierce through everything that we are and everything that we do. Jesus broke through our shame. Our sins. Even our flaws and became perfected in Him. Being not just a constant support and love but EVERLASTING even after the end of this generation. He'll still be the same.

No doubt that life is tough. Like, who doesn't know that? :P But God offers us SPECIFICALLY everything we need and its always what's best for us. Whereas the world may have everything we want but we don't need them.

Philippians 4:19
19 And this same God who takes care of me will supply all your needs from his glorious riches, which have been given to us in Christ Jesus.

It's definitely a tough road down this life. But there's always one truth that will keep us standing and trusting Him..


indeed, He makes all things new (:


L FOR LINGUINI!
M FOR MICHELLE!

p.s : i might have to pull off a disappearing act once again due to the preparation of O' Levels. I don't care how much you demand for an update. You just have to deal with it :) I'm already giving and early notice anyway. NYAHHAHAHAHA!

p.p.s : jabali, i miss you. HAHA!